BusinessLawGuy's Blog

Expectations are important whether it’s your expectations of yourself or setting expectations for others. In both cases it’s good to be realistic. If your expectations aren’t, it is a negative because you set the expectation too low as if you didn’t have faith in yourself in a given situation or set the expectation too high and don’t come close to touching it.

In setting expectations for yourself, you need to think them through. It may be the expectations you have regarding a co-worker, family member, or friend. Or maybe about a new job or opportunity. The hard part is thinking through if you have enough information to have realistic expectations. If not, can you get the information you need to do so? Information is power and an important part of being able to set your expectations.

When you’re setting expectations for others it may be even more important to make sure you have the information you need to set realistic expectations. In my role as an attorney, my clients are looking to me to walk them through the process of whatever legal situation they find themselves in and to advise them on the possible and likely outcomes. If I can’t do so, I’m not doing my job. 

Of course I can’t know whether a transaction will close or the outcome of a lawsuit, but I have enough experience to guide clients through each step and either set expectations step by step or regarding the ultimate outcome. Sometimes it’s not very specific because I don’t have the information I need to do so. If that’s the case, I let my client know and then, if I acquire new information, I revisit the issue of expectations based on what I’ve learned. 

Many times expectations are a moving target. Knowing this can help you set them for yourself or others. So when setting expectations, be realistic and adjust as new information is learned, while always being honest with yourself or whoever’s expectations you’re setting.

When you are striving to reach a goal, do you get there by the intensity you bring to it or by consistency in following the steps you have sketched out? I think it’s a combination of the two. You can employ both to pursue your goals and dreams.

Intensity can move you forward like a big push someone gives you when are on a swing. It’s focus and energy. It may allow you to complete a time sensitive project, move a long term project forward a few steps, or get over a hump that had you stopped in place. It accelerates your progress whether in getting to or crossing the finish line.

Consistency is when you have discipline to regularly work on a project or goal. Discipline is helpful in keeping you on track. It’s easy to not get back to work when it’s a nice day outside or a friend calls you do do something fun. But if you do what you planned it’s investing in yourself. 

When you work consistently and at times with intensity, you will see a return on your investment. Working with intensity all the time isn’t possible. It’s like inspiration in that you don’t always know when a burst will come. When it does, go with it. And even if it doesn’t, keep working on your goals regularly and you will have a much better chance to the reach them.

We all take inspiration from different people, actions, inaction, etc. Sometimes it comes out of nowhere and sometimes from surprising places. When it does you need to be ready to notice and process what it means to you. 

For instance, I find inspiration for various blog posts I’ve written from many different sources, many unexpected. The sources include a random comment on a podcast, something one of my children says, and once, from a comment made by an announcer about a snowboarder who had won a gold medal in the Olympics. You never know when it will hit you or where it will come from, but you know it once it does. 

Earlier this year I read about an 8 year old who has unexpectedly inspired other children. Dillon Helbig, who is from Boise, Idaho, is a second grader who wrote a book and then hid it on a library shelf. This action resulted in there being a waiting list to check out his hand written book and other children wanting to write stories and books too. The whole story is great (and easy to find on the Internet).  And now other children want to write. How cool!

Where will your next inspiration come from? There is no way to know. All you have to do is be open to it. Looking for it can work for some, but many times it comes out of left field and is a surprise. Next time you’re inspired will you act, or let the opportunity pass you by?

As has been said by Eric Dewey of eLegal Training, Networking is about knowing more people; connecting is about knowing people more. The distinction is obvious. You know a lot of people professionally and personally, but you actually are connected to only a fraction of those you know.

When you are at a business, social or charitable event, you likely run into many people you know. With many of these people, you will know them “socially” or “professionally”, which is a way of saying you know them, who they are, but are not deeply connected with them and have no investment in their successes or failures.

I think a good example is a small town of say 1,000 people. In a small town, you are likely to know everyone else who lives there. At the same time, you will not be connected with 999 other people. Maybe you are connected with 40-70. This is because connection requires a deeper relationship than simply meeting someone. It involves time, mutual respect, and participation in the relationship by both people to become more than mere acquaintances.

Another good example is LinkedIn. I have approximately 16,000 connections on LinkedIn. But it would be more truthful to say I am networked with approximately 16,000 people on LinkedIn because it is not possible for me to be connected to that many people. If I went through that list, maybe I am actually connected to 100 to 200 of those people, maybe more, but nowhere near 16,000. It’s just not possible.

True connections make up your community. People in communities care about their connections’ success and have a relationship built on mutual respect and trust. Respect and trust have to be earned before someone in your network becomes an actual connection. It takes time and work on the part of both people.

Once you have a connection, you will learn more about each other, be interested in transfer of knowledge and information, and care about each other’s successes (and failures). When you reach this level with another person you add another layer to the community you are building.

Through your networking activities you should have a goal to find people to connect with. By identifying possible connections and forging new relationships you will strengthen the foundation of your community and build the type of community you want to be a part of. These types of mutually beneficial relationships involve real connection and make your life far more interesting.

We all have a pitch to make and the need to do so comes up all of the time. Many times you are making a pitch unconsciously because it can be second nature for some. Think about how good your pitch could be if you actually thought about what you want to say in a given situation.

A pitch is about conveying information to one or more people to obtain a desired result. It can be to a potential client or customer, a potential investor, or a new potential connection.

It is hard work to come up with a pitch. In most situations you will lose the other person’s attention unless you have a short and to the point pitch. This is why people reference the thirty second elevator speech.

So how is your pitch? Is it good? Do you have different pitches for different situations? Spending time thinking about this or outlining pitches is time spent investing in yourself.

You should practice your pitch, including to others you know and trust to provide honest feedback. It isn’t as easy as you may think, but it’s worth it. You want your pitch to come out sounding natural. That’s why you need to practice both alone and in front of other people. Take and listen to constructive criticism and then see where your new pitch can lead you!

So what should you do?  Work on a pitch by thinking of your audience and the message you want to convey.  Don’t make it too long or use words people generally won’t know the meaning of, i.e. dumb it down so whoever you are speaking to will understand what you are saying. By doing so you will avoid your audience thinking about what a word meant and missing the next part of what you are saying.

After practicing, use your new pitch. See what works and feels comfortable. This will allow you to continually revise it to be the best version for the moment and have the best chance for your pitch to be successful.

I recently came across a good quote I hadn’t read in quite a long time and it spoke to something I agree with, which is the importance of being a lifetime learner. I was cleaning out some old emails and the quote was in an email from a friend. The quote brought to mind a truth: continuous learning and training makes for a better and more interesting life and work place.

The quote is “Everyone is born a genius, but the process of living de-geniuses them.”  It is by Buckminster Fuller, who has been described as an American architect, systems theorist, author, designer, inventor, critic of work, and futurist. What an interesting description for a man who, among many other activities and accomplishments, was a prolific writer, invented the geodesic dome, and was a president of Mensa, the organization for people with genius level IQs. I think his quote is correct on many levels. 

We all have potential, but realizing potential takes work, continuous work.  We all know intelligent people who are disinterested in learning or otherwise do not apply themselves, evidencing the truth that intelligence is not a predictor of success. Learning and applying yourself provides a better chance of improvement, let alone success.

The time to step up is today. It already is February, but it’s not too late to come up with a plan. What should you learn? Well that depends on what you do and what will help you do what you do. The first step you should take is to come up with ideas and make a choice on the first step based on what speaks to you. This could be reading a business book, taking a course online or at a local community college, or finding a mentor. The options are endless and depend on you to make the choice.

Do something, because the right choice is to do something and stop the de-genius process!

I’m not asking what about your return on investment. I’m asking what about your ripple of impact. How does who you are and what you do impact others and your community? If you don’t think this matters you are being shortsighted and missing the market.

Your impact on others reflects on you. Do you serve as a formal or informal mentor? Do you treat people kindly? Do you volunteer in your community? These activities matter. They help you, those around you, and your community. Mentoring younger or less experienced people at your company will make your people and company better. Treating people well rubs off and others are more likely to do the same. Volunteering on a non-profit board or at an event does good for those in need and lifts up your community. Of course there are many other examples, but I think you get the point.

What you do matters in both small and large ways. You never know when a simple positive action you take will result in someone else doing something amazing that wouldn’t have happened otherwise . It’s like looking at timing or a missed opportunity or realizing most times you won’t know when an opportunity has been lost. If you regularly behave in a manner that results in return based on your impact you won’t have to wonder because even if you don’t know for sure, good things are likely to happen.

Discipline helps you get done what you plan and need to each day. This is part of doing what you say you’re going to do. This provides stability because it allows others to know how you act or respond in various situations.

This could be my clients knowing I try to return or respond to calls and emails within 24 hours at the outside, or that when they are communicating with me I’m focused on them and whatever they are dealing with. They are not my only clients, but I can make them feel like they are by exercising discipline to focus on them and their issues.

It’s my understanding the single biggest complaint made to the Arizona State Bar by clients is attorneys not timely communicating with them or responding to communications. This is such a simple thing even when you’re busy. When hyperfocused on a project we all need a break. When I am doing this, I often calendar time every hour or so to review emails and voicemails, as well as responding to a few for 10-30 minutes. It allows you to give that strong focus a break and stay up on what is happening in real time. Doing this takes discipline and planning and, for me, has bee a work in progress for years. Done in the right manner your other clients will never think about you spending most of your day focused on other clients’ matters because you timely respond to and interact with them.

These type of actions make you look stable and your business static no matter what you do for a living. Of course there will be times you can’t do this, but, with discipline, you can adjust. It you’re in trial, in a closing, or on vacation you can let clients with pending matters know ahead of time you won’t be able to respond as fast as usual. You can set up an out of office reminder for email and change your voicemail message too. Setting expectations generally and in relation to your current goings on will prevent misunderstandings and frustrations on the part of others.

The point is for you to determine where you can use discipline in your daily routine and work. Even when you think you have discipline, spend time thinking about how you can improve. We all can if we try.

I saw this somewhere in the last few weeks and it rang true to me. The choices we make define us, always. Some may be smaller and some larger, but together they show who you are. Sometimes the choices that seem smaller show more than you think because they are choices you make on a daily basis.

How long do you take to return phone calls or emails? If you’re like me, you receive a large number of calls and emails. It’s easy to tell yourself you will get to them when you get to them. But in my case the calls and emails mainly are from clients, opposing counsel, and potential clients. If I delay responding to clients, how do you think they will feel about it? Maybe they will think they and their issues aren’t a priority compared with other client’s matters. If I delay responding to opposing counsel it delays whatever I’m working on for my client. And clients want matters moving forward toward resolution or completion. If I delay responding to a potential client, I likely will not be retained and they will find another attorney to work with. This is an example of day to day choices you can choose to deal with in a manner that reflects well on you or not.

Of course big decisions are easy to look to because, well, they’re big decisions. I think big decisions rest on the shoulders of the small decisions that lead to the need to make a big decision. By this I mean the daily choices you make define you and will align with the big decisions you make later on because such choices will be seen as being in line with how you consistently act in making any type of decision. In most situations those who really know you would likely guess the decision you would make given the potential choices. This is because your choices define you.

If upon reflection you think you need to make changes to your day to day decisions and how they reflect on you, make a plan. You can change how you do things and the choices you make. It will be hard, but what important choices aren’t.

This sounds so easy, but can be much harder in practice. You know you have said things, likely out loud, when driving and some car cut you off. Maybe you would say it to the person when you end up next to each other at a traffic light or not. People who do are risking their life because they let their emotions get the best of them. Other situations may not have the physical risks of road rage, but they instead have personal and professional risks.

This easily can happen in the workplace, whether with co-workers or, if you deal with them like I do, opposing attorneys. When dealing with a jerk it can be hard to stop yourself from reacting. Before acting on emotion, try to think whether how you really want to respond will (1) benefit you; (2) reflect on you; (3) affect your dealings with the jerk in the future; and, if applicable, help you help your client. If you do this it’s likely you will not be baited to respond in kind. It may even make the jerk realize they’re not getting a rise out of you and they may mellow out then or in future dealings.

Keeping emotions in check can be difficult. If you know it is for you, you should come up with strategies to help you when you find yourself in a situation where being a jerk is an option (which really means in any communication you have with anyone). Examples could include nicely exiting the conversation, taking deep breaths while the other person is speaking (obviously works best if you’re on the phone or dealing with written communications), or come up with a catchphrase or mantra you can tell yourself with the hope to de-escalate the situation or conversation. Maybe you can use “serenity now” like Frank Costanza on Seinfeld:

The point is to not let yourself be drawn into situations that can reflect badly on you, your co-workers, or your client. It may feel good in the moment to yell back or insult someone, but once the moment passes it probably will be something you wish you had handled better.