BusinessLawGuy's Blog

If I make a misrepresentation to a client, opposing counsel, or a judge the reputation I have worked to build for years will be ruined in an instant. The same is true for you if you lie to people you do business with. Once you are caught in a lie, all of your truths become questionable.

Early in my career I heard an experienced attorney say “a half-truth equals a whole lie.” This is simple and there are no exceptions. Anything not one-hundred percent true is a lie. And note that it’s far easier to remember the truth than a lie.

Of course, at times, we all soften the truth to try not to hurt someone’s feelings. That is because some situations are more nuanced than others. I am not speaking to that type of situation. I’m speaking about your general day-to-day professional life in which your reputation is at stake.

You need to understand that honesty is part of your reputation. You may not be called out or caught every time you aren’t honest, but if it catches up to you it won’t be pretty. You will lose relationships or opportunities potentially including your then current employment. You will lose opportunities that will upset you. You also will lose opportunities you don’t even know you lost because they just don’t come your way as a result of your diminished reputation.

Trust is like your reputation in that it’s earned. The real difference is that people will assume you’re honest unless or until they believe you aren’t. If they think or hear you’re not, the chances of convincing them otherwise are slim.

It follows that once trust is lost it will either take longer than you want to imagine to earn it back if it even can be earned back. People you have professional relationships with may still deal with you (mainly if they have to, such as in the workplace), but it won’t be the same. Even if it feels like it, a lack of trust permeates relationships far into the future.

The old saying “think before you speak” is on point. Lying is a (bad) choice. whether you can call it embellishment or something similar, others will think you stretch the truth and not know what to believe. In all situations, lying makes the road forward in your career harder. On the other hand, telling the truth helps to build your reputation and creates the goodwill that makes people want to know and work with you.

If you compare your life with that of others around you, especially those you believe to be more successful or happy than you, you will be unhappy in your life. Teddy Roosevelt said “Comparison is the thief of joy” more than a century ago and it still rings true today. The point is to not be envious of others or, more accurately, of what you perceive the success or happiness of others to be.

Just because you think someone has a better job title or seems to have more money than you doesn’t mean it’s true. The person you view as a “higher up” may hate the position they are in or constantly be under high levels of stress. The person who seems to have money may be living on credit cards and other debt in a house of cards on the edge of a financial collapse. Not making assumptions is a topic for another day but definitely applies here.

Similarly, don’t be vindictive. Don’t try to get even. Doing so never is the right course of action. If you do try to get even, it reveals that the only one keeping score is you, and that you are the one losing. Plus, it takes time to build a good reputation and mere seconds to destroy it.

This leads to something else that is important. Do your best at whatever it is you do and let what happens happen. Do so in a way that is honest and allows you to look back with no regrets. If you don’t do this and instead step on others to lift yourself up, the person you “run over” may be the vindictive sort too. If that persons tries to get even it will waste your time and take your focus from the things you need to or would rather be focusing on.

Embracing the uniqueness of your own journey rather than constantly measuring it against others is a path for achieving or maintaining happiness. Comparing yourself to others only steals the joy you could find in your own achievements and experiences. Instead, try to reach and maintain a mindset of contentment in which you celebrate your successes and setbacks without the need for vindication. By focusing on yourself, you can stay the course on your own path without the shadows of comparison dimming your light.

Poor time management limits success more than most people realize. The people you work for, whether bosses or clients, will notice if you show up late or miss a deadline. When you do it reflects poorly on you and your company, and how you deal with being called out does too. If you struggle with punctuality, you need to fix that now.

Being casually late to a social event is acceptable, but being late to a business meeting isn’t. Showing up late to a business meeting sends a few different messages including that the meeting isn’t important or a priority or that other people or work is more important. None of these are good messages to send to co-workers or clients.

For attorneys, that business meeting may be with a client or a court hearing. It is a bad look to show up late for court and will affect the judge’s perception of you. With clients, they expect me to be on time for meetings and calls with them and on top of the deadlines in their matters. If I am not, in addition to whatever bad message it sends to the client on the importance of their matter to me, it could negatively affect my ability to achieve their desired goal or outcome. This will lead to the reality that someone who you do wrong is more likely to let many people know about their negative experience with you thereby negatively affecting your reputation.

For other lines of work, not being on time or meeting deadlines will affect promotions and raises, potential sales, or getting that new customer or client. Bosses and customers alike want people who do what they say they will when they said they will. Whatever your job, there are many others doing what you do and who will do what they say when they say. Differentiating yourself by not doing so will keep you stuck in place or, worse yet, out of a job.

If you struggle showing up on time or with other deadlines there are many tools at your disposal that can help. Every computer you use, from the desktop computer to your phone, has programs with alarms and reminders that alert you to upcoming meetings to deadlines. You can set these for what works for you or in relation to a specific deadline. This may mean a 5 minute warning before the start of a meeting or call or a two week lead time on the deadline for a big project you’re working on. The point is you can set one or more reminders and alerts depending on what works for you.

If you have challenges with this you know it and you can work on doing better. If this is you, work on what you can do to change generally and using the tools available to you. Doing so will provide you with the best chance at professional success.

Many people sugarcoat what they say to save other’s feelings. I think this is because most people shy aware from potentially confrontational conversations or don’t know how to effectively communicate something negative or that is constructive criticism. If you are unable or unwilling to have honest, hard conversations with your peers and employees it’s detrimental to your business. It also effectively trains the next generation of up and coming leaders to continue a work environment in which communicating about negative topics or trying to course correct doesn’t happen.

It reminds me of a quote from Zig Ziglar: “The only thing worse than training employees and losing them is not training them and keeping them.” This is true because if you can’t be honest with peers and employees, it becomes part of your company’s cultural. In such an instance your company likely is headed for lower results and isn’t a place employees will want to work long-term.

I have heard hard conversations referred to as “courageous conversations.” These types of hard or difficult conversations usually deal with performance issues, attitude issues, disagreements on important business issues, or the like. These conversations need to happen or your business will suffer. Importantly, they need to happen in a timely manner to have the best effect.

There is much information online and numerous books on this topic. The general gist is that as part of sharing negative information, you also must accentuate the positive. If you manage people you should spend time to learn about having hard conversations because they do not come naturally for most people. The goal is to make difficult conversations constructive and a benefit to you, the other person, and your business.

In having difficult conversations you can and should tailor what you are going to say based on who you’re speaking with. If it helps, practice what you plan to say or use an outline. If you instead default to sugarcoating important conversations and messages it will be part of your company’s culture, nothing will change, and opportunities will be lost.