Archives for September 2019

Be Yourself

Dance, go down the slide at your kid’s school, sing along with that song you love while driving down the road. The point is to do things that bring you joy as long as it’s not at the expense of others.

Don’t let other’s opinions control what you do and the choices you make. You know yourself and you should focus on what you think and like. If you are open to other’s opinions, you can ask people you trust what they think, but then make your own decisions, i.e. dance to your own drummer.

Life is short, so being yourself and doing things that are joyful is important. If you don’t, the moment will pass you by. You may or may not regret your inaction. If you do act, you likely will look back with fond memories and smile when you do. And who doesn’t like looking back on a fun memory and smiling to themselves or sharing it with others?

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Don’t judge

It is easy to judge others and many times we do so unconsciously. A great example is the person driving too fast and who may have cut you off. It is easy to just assume they are aggressive drivers who think wherever they need to be is more important than where you are going. I like to think they have somewhere they need to be, such as rushing to the hospital or something similar. It keeps my blood pressure down and changes what my potential reaction might be otherwise.

It is good to remember we all have faults and bad habits. And we don’t want to be judged on the (hopefully) outlier moment when we act badly. Maybe thinking this way can help us change behaviors or bad habits. Focusing on yourself is much more productive than focusing on others.

Sometimes I try to make not judging others a game. What I mean is I make up a story on why they are how they are, are acting how they are, or why they just cut me off on the road. I am sure what I think is not close to being accurate, but it keeps me in check and sometimes makes me laugh to myself if I come up with something really good. Such a reaction is way better than thinking in a judgmental way or thinking negative thoughts about others.

Next time that car cuts you off, think about the emergency they could be dealing with. Also think what others think when you drive like that because you are in a hurry . Then try not to laugh as you think about how everything is relative to where you are sitting.

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Acknowledge mistakes and move on

We all make mistakes. Sometimes others notice, sometimes not. When you do, find a way to learn from it and laugh it off. If you do so, it will pass faster and you can move forward instead of looking backwards.

The more you let mistakes roll off of your back, other people will forget too. The point is to move forward, fix what you can, or note what you did so you can learn from it. This includes acknowledging mistakes to superiors at work or your spouse, etc.

It doesn’t mean there won’t be a tense or stressful moment. If you are honest and apologize, and maybe explain what happened or that you have learned from the mistake, the faster you will move past it.

Remember, everyone makes dumb mistakes. Everyone. You aren’t alone in this. If you figure out how to deal with mistakes in a constructive fashion they will be in your rearview mirror as you move into the future with a clear conscience and free from the weight of the mistake.

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Be Kind

We all are moving fast through our days. Are you nice to the people who cross your path? You should be because how you treat people is what stays with them when they think about you.

The benefits of being kind outweigh the efforts you put in. Knowing this and acting on it will help you and your reputation.

In the same vein, do random acts of kindness. Bring in donuts (or maybe something healthier) to your office for your co-workers. Compliment someone. Be patient with those who make mistakes, whether a co-worker or the waiter or waitress at a restaurant.

Doing so is good for you in many ways. The feedback and reactions you get will brighten your day. What you do or say will brighten others’ days. Try it and see how good it makes you feel.

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