Posts with category - common sense

Be nice

I generally do not rerun prior posts but with the current state of things, the general negativity that seems to be hanging in the air, and coarseness in dealings this post from 2018 came to mind. It applied then. It applies now. It applies always.

Life seems to be made up of many rules, written and unwritten. Most are a matter of common sense, like just being nice to people you meet and deal with. It sounds so obvious you may be asking yourself why I would spend time even mentioning it. Despite being obvious, I’ll bet someone just came to mind who you dealt with recently and the dealings were unpleasant because the other person just wasn’t nice.

I know who that person is for me. It was an opposing attorney on a litigation matter. I know this can go with the territory, but most litigators actually are good to deal with and range from professional to really nice. It’s what makes the people who aren’t nice stand out. I have been known to say that it seems easier to remember nasty or obnoxious opposing attorneys more than those who are nice.

In my case, the issue being discussed seemed pretty obvious to me. It was procedural, dictated by rules, and is something that has to be done in every lawsuit. Even though it seems like that should make it an easy matter to deal with, it resulted in opposing counsel raising his voice with me and arguing with me despite me not arguing back. It also caused multiple conversations and emails on what shouldn’t have been a big deal. This wasted my time and increased the fees incurred by both of our clients.  Importantly, it didn’t advance any agenda he may have had or put his client in a better position legally.

In a different context, someone I have known for years and who always has been exceedingly nice to me, is not to everyone.  An example is that these person is very nice to people who he thinks can help him in some way or are “on his level.”  This manifests itself by him not always treating those he views as below him with courtesy or respect. I think it is so ingrained he really doesn’t know how he comes across and would be shocked if someone said something to him.

On the other hand, out of law school I worked for a gentleman named Jim Marlar. He later became a federal judge and is just a really nice guy. When he took me to the federal courthouse in Phoenix for the first time, when I was still in law school and serving as a law clerk for his firm, he introduced me to federal judges, but also to the court librarian and to courthouse janitors. Really. He treated all of them the same, knew their names, about them, and had a real connection forged by years of simply being nice and treating people with respect. It was a great lesson I have never forgotten.

I know it can be easier said than done to be nice to everyone. It is even harder when they are not being nice to you. With the attorney I mentioned, I do my best not to raise my voice, get sucked into an unnecessary argument, and remain professional. It hasn’t changed his behavior, but maybe if I continue to do the same he will realize his rudeness and posturing don’t help him and our dealings will be better. At least I am trying to be nice and not make the situation worse.

The next time someone is not nice to you or you encounter someone you don’t necessarily want to engage with, just be nice because it may help, and certainly won’t harm your reputation like sinking to their level or ignoring someone. It’s your reputation. What do you want it to be?

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It’s always a good time to think about your goals

Every day is a good day to think about and set goals. these can be short term or long term goals. Many people look to New Year’s Resolutions as the time you set goals or challenges for yourself. A lot of those same people are the ones who let those resolutions fall by the wayside before February 1. The fact is there is no date or time frame that matters for goal setting. What matters is taking the time to think about your goals and then go about identifying the steps and related time frames on the way to reaching your goals.

Once you set a goal, think through the action steps necessary for you to achieve the goal. I suggest you put it in writing and keep it somewhere you see it often. This will allow you to see where you are on the road to the goal, as well as to adjust the steps. That’s right, you can change the action plan to reach a goal midstream. If something isn’t working or a step in your process ends up taking longer or shorter than expected, acknowledge it by revisiting and revising your plan.

If you don’t have a roadmap to reach a goal, how can you expect to ever reach that goal. The roadmap I have found to be most useful and work is turning goals into SMART goals:

  • Specific – target a specific  goal or area for improvement.
  • Measurable – quantify or at least suggest an indicator of progress.
  • Assignable – specify what you will do.
  • Realistic – state what results can realistically be achieved.
  • Time-related – specify when the result(s) can be achieved.

This works for any type of goal, whether personal and professional. What if you want to learn to play an instrument? Find an instructor good with beginners through your network or online research and take weekly lessons. And then practice, a lot. Even if it is fifteen or twenty minutes a day, scheduling time in your day should be part of your plan because then you’re more likely to practice.

What if you want to write a blog like this one? I schedule time into my calendar to write and edit, as well as to post and distribute. Sometimes I block out time to write one post and sometimes I write more than one at a time because I know my upcoming schedule is extra busy. Of course it helps that I enjoy doing this, but if I didn’t take the steps I do, I likely would miss weeks at a time because life is busy.

The first step you need to do is to come up with a goal. The second step is to determine the steps you think will allow you to reach your goal. If you are not sure, talk with a mentor, a peer, or someone else in your life you trust. This can be about your actual goal, the steps to reach it, or both. If you come up with the steps yourself, run them by someone you trust because it helps to receive feedback from others on goals and action plans.

If you don’t set goals everything will stay the same. If you think that’s okay you should be asking yourself why. It equates to being a lifetime learner and continually trying to improve personally and professionally. Try it and see what happens.

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Professional Envy: Understanding and Overcoming Workplace Jealousy

Fulton J. Sheen said, “Jealousy is the tribute mediocrity pays to genius.” While harsh, this observation rings particularly true in competitive workplace environments, where success often breeds resentment among colleagues. From subtle undermining to overt hostility, jealousy can poison team dynamics and hinder the progress of your business.

Jealousy is a complex emotion that, in a professional setting, undermines collaboration and productivity. Sometimes you can see or feel it in a palpable way. Other times it’s much more subtle but still harmful.

Businesses such as law firms present a particularly stark example of how professional jealousy can manifest. In these environments, some young attorneys eye other attorneys as their competition and may respond negatively to successes experienced by others. In doing so, those who feel inadequate or threatened often direct their frustration toward those who seem to be more successful rather than focusing on their own growth and contributions. This results in damage the firm’s culture and potentially its bottom line.

Addressing jealousy requires open communication and a culture that values collaboration over competition. All businesses can benefit from implementing mentorship programs that promote knowledge sharing and foster a sense of community among colleagues. These types of programs can help mitigate feelings of jealousy. When individuals see their peers as allies rather than adversaries, the overall morale and productivity of the business can improve significantly.

Instead of viewing colleagues’ achievements as a threat, successful professionals learn to channel their competitive energy into personal growth. I find the most resilient employees understand that another person’s success doesn’t diminish their own potential for success or advancement.

Addressing workplace jealousy is difficult but possible. Leaders can help by fostering a culture of collaboration over competition. However, the ultimate responsibility lies with each person to acknowledge their jealous feelings and transform them into motivation, thereby turning their envy into inspiration to achieve their best.

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The culture of your business matters

You business has a culture whether it is conscious or not. My firm has a defined culture we call the JW Way (https://www.jaburgwilk.com/jw-way-fundamentals). It is a mission statement consisting of twenty seven fundamentals that the owners and employees strive to live in operating and working in the firm. Since making these fundamentals a conscious part of our firm it we found that it improved what we already saw as a good place to work. Overall, it has had a positive impact on our firm and the bottom line.

If you’re surprised, you shouldn’t be. Focusing on company culture forces you to focus on your employees and clients. Doing so always is in the best interest of your business. The point is without great employees and customers, you don’t have a business.

If you ask most business owners about the culture of their company it can be hard to put into words. The effort to do so helps bring positives and negatives of your business into focus. It also results in the realization that changes are needed all the time, which reminds me of the maxim that change is constant. It’s not lost on me that change is hard and you have to know the possibility exists that the investment in doing so may or may not have the desired results despite the time and effort you have put in.

It reminds me of a story I read some years ago about Incheon Airport in Seoul, Korea. For years it was ranked No. 1 by passengers. When one employee was asked “What is it? What’s so magical?”, he responded as follows: “It’s because everyone – airport and airline personnel, security, concessionaires – we all share the same vision and we all deliver the same level of customer service.” That describes a culture at that airport that allowed passengers to see and feel that they mattered. All of the airport’s employees striving to live that culture allowed the passengers to live and feel that difference during their travels instead of the usual stress of feeling like you’re being herded from line to line to line.

When a business has that type of culture it’s no surprise that success follows. That type of culture tends to weed out those who don’t or refuse to follow the culture. That is what you want because it allows you to bring on people who appear better suited to be part of the culture and therefore the team that is your business. These types of incremental changes are what improves your business over time.

If you simply ignore the importance of culture and allow it just to happen the odds are you won’t like where you end up. By thinking about and discussing company culture you can create the type of environment you want to work in, attract like-minded employees, and give you and your business a better chance for success.

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Be the change you want to see

This past weekend I was reading something and saw the phrase “be the change you want to see.” I’ve heard it before and have written about the benefits of change. That day it struck me as I believe change and trying new things is the road to success in business, as well as in life and happiness.

When days are like being on a treadmill, life is monotonous. Maybe it struck me because I’m in the middle of a two-week long arbitration hearing and in many ways the days are like being on a treadmill. On this occasion it read to me as a manifesto saying to take action and therefore control of your own narrative.

In looking into and thinking about the benefits of change, I found and remembered that this saying is part of a quote from Ghandi, which says, “If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world also change.” His point is obvious: if you change what you’re doing the options and potential results change as opposed as waiting for others to change or, in most people’s thinking, for the others to magically help us.

An example is waiting and thinking you will happen to meet people who are beneficial to your business instead of having a plan to meet people and asking those who know you well to connect you with others. In that case the change is taking action instead of waiting for things to “happen” to or for you. The point is to change and take action now instead of waiting to see what others do (or don’t do). Be clear, this is a personal call to action that you alone are in control of.

We all have heard the stories of entrepreneurs who had many failures before hitting it big. When you implement change, you will fail many times. Think of it like a mailing campaign where success may be having a 5% response rate. For me that means that a high percentage of the people I connect or am connected with will not lead to new or increased business. If this sounds bad to you note that it’s reality because not every change or new action you take will be a homerun. Plus, the person you meet for lunch may end up referring you a great customer a year later based on that one meeting. You really never know.

None of this happens if you don’t change and try new things. You need to take the first step to create change, whether in relation to your work, to self improvement, or improving your community, such as volunteering or joining non-profit board. Once you start, others will take note and have the opportunity to join in, thereby providing a better opportunity for the change you’ve implemented to succeed. Even if you fail, you will learn, which improves your chances for success in the future.

Think of the change you want to see in your world and the world at large. Then set goals and analyze the steps to get there, which will lead you to the actions necessary to bring the change you seek. Don’t let the challenge to change hold you back. As the saying goes, the first step is the hardest. Challenges you have no control over always will come up as part of life, but by effecting change in yourself and through your actions you’re doing more than sitting by and waiting for things to happen or work out. You control the change you want to see and you should start now.

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Get up and network now

You grow or stay stagnant. My point is that you either are taking action to improve yourself and your business or you are not. This is similar to being all talk and no action or not. Action matters and there is no time like the present to put yourself out there, meet people, and try to expand your network.

Another part of this is continually assessing whether whatever you’re doing is achieving your desired results. This informs what actions you continue to do, abandon, or change. By doing this, it has helped me utilize my time better and with much better results.

If all I can do is write about what to do, but not do it, that is to my detriment. I like writing about networking and similar topics, which is why you are reading this today, but my goal is not to be a writer. I want to be known as an attorney who is constantly trying to expand his network and develop meaningful relationships with the people I deal with. By doing so I have better control over my professional path and create opportunities for me and those with whom I’m connected.

One of the things I like best about what I do is meeting and working with all different types of people including other attorneys (really), accountants and other professionals, business owners, and many others. The diversity in the people I deal with keeps me engaged, interested, and energized to keep networking. It keeps me trying new things in my effort to expand my network and develop interesting work for me and my colleagues. I always say if we were all the same the world would be a boring place, which I truly believe. Those differences are the fabric of the world.

So are you working meet people and expand your possibilities or staying stagnant? You either are improving yourself or not. If you do not do so you are destined to stay in place and the life of the worker bee, which is not necessarily a bad place to be. But if you want be climbing higher with larger goals, no matter if it is in your profession, your company, or your industry, start by expanding your network and see where it can take you.

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Management 101: hold on loosely

Management is about execution. More specifically, management is about executing the visions of your company’s leadership. Managers work in the present while leaders work in the future. The point is that managers of people need to focus on how to get the people they manage to execute now. Like many roles, there are any number of ways to manage people.

Some people micromanage their teams because they have the need to control what their subordinates or employees do or don’t trust their team members to execute on their own. There can be good reasons or at least what feel like good reasons to do so. For instance, many managers argue that the end product is going out under the manager’s name or the name of the company and it’s up to them to make sure it’s as good as can be. Those types of managers have a blind spot and don’t realize that having control of the end product or goal is different than micromanaging the process to reach that end product or goal.

I think a better way to manage is to guide your team while giving them the freedom and flexibility to work towards the end goal. A manager may think he or she has the best way to manufacture the widget or is a better writer than whoever is drafting something that will go out under their name. But if you train your people well and then let them control the process, amazing things can happen. George S. Patton once said “If you tell people where to go, but not how to get there, you’ll be amazed at the results.” This is how products or processes are improved because innovation happens when people have a starting point and an ending point, as well as the opportunity to think outside of the box. It also provides great teaching moments for managers and their team.

In my world this means letting a younger attorney on my team lead a case or write the first draft of a pleading or document. In doing so, it doesn’t mean I have no say on what the plan or end product will be, but I trust that once I provide the big picture, what we’re dealing with, and where we need to go that my team members can choose the path to get there. I regularly am intrigued and amazed at the ideas people come up with and use that I wouldn’t have thought of that result in work that reflects well on me and the entire team. Giving team members ownership in the process is a positive for everyone.

I challenge you to think about all of this the next time you want to tell someone you manage exactly how to do what you’re asking them to do. Try telling them what you need and let them choose the path. You likely will get the same end result as if you micromanaged them and probably will be surprised by how they got there. Either way you get what you need, but one path leave the door open for innovation and positive feelings for your team members who know you trust them to do their job.

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Manage stress for a better and healthier life

We all have stress. I picture an empty room where challenges keep coming at me from straight in front of me, the top left corner, the middle right corner, or wherever. Well, you get the idea. The point is that challenges keep coming at us from all angles as if we are in a video game trying to move forward. Some challenges are exciting and invigorating while others are hard and stressful. They never stop, nor does the need to manage the daily and regular stress of dealing with these challenges.

Many times this is easier said than done. When I speak with people about their business, I usually hear how well things are going and how great everything is. Many times what I am hearing is true. Other times, further into the conversation, I learn the truth, which is, whether or not things are going well, the person is under incredible stress.

In my world it could be the closing date for a large transaction with many moving parts and participants where things aren’t pinned down to the last possible moment. Or maybe it’s preparing to go into trial for two weeks knowing all the other work for other clients really doesn’t stop during that time. I heard one person years ago refer to it as juggling cats. It certainly feels that way in the moment.

Learning methods to cope with the large amount of stress that weighs you down in such moments is a gift to yourself, as well as an ongoing process throughout life. It is impossible to be stress free all the time, but living in constant state of stress is unhealthy. By finding coping mechanisms you can manage stress better than just trying to ignore the fact it’s there. By the way, everyone around you knows when you’re in it even if you think you’re acting cool, calm, and collected. From body language to voice there are many tells when someone is in a high stress moment.

So what do you do to try and control your stress? If something doesn’t come to mind immediately, you need to find something. For me, it’s meditation and exercise including hiking. For others I know, it’s cooking, playing music, golfing, etc. It’s up to you to find what activities help you manage your stress on a regular basis. Whatever it is should one or more things you incorporate in to your regular routines. By doing so, whether your stress level is high, low, or somewhere in-between, you will be able to better manage it.

All of this will lead you to help yourself find a healthier lifestyle, in both your mental and physical health, because stress negatively affects you mentally and physically. Think about your interests outside of work. Whatever it is it should be an activity you enjoy, which should go without saying, and that helps you relax. Then take small steps such as doing it regularly for a month and then another and so on. Then look back with an honest eye as to how you have been dealing with stress and how you feel. My bet is that you will be in a better place.

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Mentoring Relationships Benefit Personal and Professional Growth

During the first decade of my career I mainly had one main formal mentor and a number of informal mentors. Most of my mentors were attorneys or judges, which makes sense given my chosen profession. Others were in different professions or businesses. The string running through all of those relationships was the professional and life lessons I learned from each one, many of which I follow to this day.

In one case with someone I considered to be an informal mentor, I’m sure the other person didn’t know I considered him to be a mentor. I never said anything because it seemed clear to me he wouldn’t have been comfortable formalizing our relationship in that manner. In hindsight I’m not sure I was right or not never saying anything, but I still look to and live by things I learned from that person.

I actually ran into him in the past year for the first time in a long time and when I mentioned to him something I learned from him that I still thought about many years later he didn’t recall the thought or conversation other than thinking it was something he would have said and that he still thought it was true. This brought home that sometimes the impact of a statement or conversation affects or impacts one of the parties more or differently than the other and that’s okay. It’s like The Rolling Stones said, “sometimes you get what you need” as I did from that long ago conversation.

The point is that whether a person is a formal mentor to you or you just consider them to be someone you trust and learn from, it’s an important relationship. Most of us have a few formal or informal mentors over time. If you think about who helped you along the way it becomes a bit more clear. What you learned may have related to your professional life, general life issues, or both. Either way, the importance of a having one or more good mentors over time can’t be ignored.

The basis of any mentor mentee relationship is support and trust. It is an exercise in listening for the mentor because a mentor is more of a facilitator or guide, not simply an instructor. But that doesn’t mean the mentor isn’t benefitting from the relationship. This type of relationship helps both parties. I find it helps self-awareness and understanding of my and the other person’s strengths and weaknesses. By participating in such a relationship, you evolve in many ways even when it’s an informal mentoring relationship and the “mentor” may not realize the role they are playing in your life.

Depending on where you are professionally or in life, think about the relationships you have in which, whether formal or unsaid, you’re in the role of mentor or mentee. If you don’t have such a relationship, seek one out now. It will help you grow as a person and, whether you are the mentor or mentee, allow you to play an important role in another’s story. These are the types of relationships that make life so rich.

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The road to success means constantly assessing and changing the actions you’re taking

Success comes from constantly assessing the results from actions you take and adjusting depending on what is working or not. If something you’re doing is not successful, you’ve got to change it or try something new. The funny thing is that the flip side is the same: if something you’re doing is successful it helps to tweak or change it to see if it can be even more successful.

Trying something new is good for you. You can work on how you generate or create business, how you organize your workspace, or you can stop at the corner coffee shop in the morning and meet your neighbors, other professionals and business owners who stopped in for a drink or snack.

Going back to your actions that are not successful or if you’re on a bad streak, the problem is you. But this isn’t what you may be thinking. Odds are you are stuck in routine and probably just doing the things that used to work for you. Every day is a new world with options for you to change something. If you don’t, you will live the Groundhog’s Day scenario of the same actions getting the same results.

One idea is to connect and reconnect with people. I know some people may be rolling their eyes because they prefer to connect electronically with little or no actual human interaction. Know that life previously required you to meet and interact with others to create success and doing so still drives business because of the connections we forge with others.

Make a list and call someone from that list each morning. If you want to dip your toe in, you can do so in three to five minutes a day. Choose someone you know and haven’t spoken to in while and call them just to say “hi” and that you are thinking of them. You can keep the call short by telling them that, your time that morning is limited, and that you would like to meet them for coffee or something similar. That personal touch means something and actually means everything.

If that doesn’t sound like your gig, come up with something else to try and do it regularly to see if it works. And then, whether or not it works, tweak or change it to see if you can make it work or make it work better.

Don’t let the success or lack of success of what you’re doing be stagnant. Change things up. Interact with people. Take action. These are other ways in which to invest in yourself.

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