BusinessLawGuy's Blog

Being respectful isn’t just good manners. It’s a way to connect with others and try to understand their position or opinion. It may be about differences in how to approach the strategy in a case, a workflow process with those on your team, or dealing with opposing counsel. In all situations realize two important things: (1) the likelihood of you changing someone’s position by being disrespectful of what they think is zero; and (2) the reputation you will be building may not be what you think or would hope for. Your actions and words follow you and speaking in the heat of the moment or an adversarial conversation can be longer lasting than you can imaging.

It is easy to see this in everyday life. The divisiveness in our country is disappointing on many levels and follows up through work and our personal lives. People demean others they know and don’t know on social media and anywhere else they can leave comments. People physically attack others at protests and otherwise. This really is unbelievable if you think about it. In many ways, our country is coming apart at the seams and many people don’t respect the thoughts or opinions of others.

You should want to try to understand why someone you work with thinks differently than you. This isn’t so they can change your thoughts or you theirs, but to understand the other’s positions and try to work together to bridge the gap. Knowing why may help you better understand them. Plus, it may help you to debate and then align regarding how to move forward.

Relationships are everything. They enrich the quality of your life. Always remember that many of the co-workers, clients, and others you disagree with are people you like and know have good qualities. Demonstrate respect by listening fully to others, considering their opinions, and figuring out how to work together moving forward.

This topic covers a lot of ground in my mind. Depending on what you’re reading, you may be escaping your day or learning something new. It may be pure fun or investing in yourself and your future.

It means reading news and knowing what’s going on in the world. It means reading books including fiction and non-fiction, which can include books related to my career and business. To me, reading for all of these reasons is important and adds value to my life, whether an entertaining fiction book, an article on an area of the law relevant to my practice, or a book on a general business related topic such as networking or management.

As for news, read whatever you like, such as the Wall Street Journal, the New Your Times, the Washington Post or other papers (or listen to news related podcasts). Better yet, read or skim two, preferably with different takes, such as being left or right leaning. Reading different points of view allows you to process issues, ideas and positions. It also will help you craft your own point of view coming from a well-read place because you’ve educated yourself on issues. You can create the time to do this by calendaring time with your morning coffee or for a mid-morning break. Knowing what is happening locally, nationally, and globally is part of being a citizen of where you live, and the bigger, broader world.

Reading books matters too. Reading the types of books you enjoy matters more. I rotate between fiction and non-fiction. For non-fiction books, I rotate between biographies and business related books. I usually use my time reading books as an escape from work and thoughts piled up from my day, but sometimes I hear about a business book I find intriguing and am willing to read something to make me think or try to improve some aspect of my live or business. You should read whatever motivates you to read. It’s not a contest to read the classics, or more business books than someone else you know. It’s your time, so choose what you read based on your interests.

The best part of doing this is taking time for yourself, but it has other benefits. It will help you be generalist on the current news and other topics you read about. It also will allow you to be a specialists in specific areas in which you have real interest. Both combine to make you more interesting to speak with at a networking event or in conversation with friends and family. You will be able to have a conversation with anyone, which will provide you with opportunities.

Being envious of other does not help you in your life. A better title or having more money doesn’t mean the person is happy or has an easier life. Walking in someone else’s shoes for real would be eye opening to see they have worries and problems, just like we all do. No one has “perfect” life. This is why envy is waste of time and energy.

For instance, people you view as being “higher up” may hate the position they are in. People who seem to have money may be living on debt. You shouldn’t make assumptions, but that is a topic for another day.

Similarly, don’t be vindictive. Don’t try to get even. If you are in a situation where you think doing so is the right course of action, the only one keeping score is you. In that case, the one losing is you, for sure. It takes time to build a good reputation and mere moments to destroy it. Don’t be that person.

I have mentioned this before. Do your best at whatever it is you do and let what happens happen. But in doing so, do it in a way that is honest so you can look back with no regrets. If you don’t, the person you “run over” may be the vindictive sort. If that persons tries to get even it will waste your time and take your focus from the things you need to or would rather be focusing on.

Always look forward, not backward. Avoid envy and getting mired in keeping score or settling scores. Focus on yourself and you will set yourself up with a better chance to for whatever you see as success.

When inspiration hits, you know. You don’t need to listen to an interview with an artist to understand it can be anytime, including when it’s not necessarily convenient. It makes me think of the musician who hears a melody while sleeping and has to decide whether to get up and write it down or record it, or to just go back to sleep. I have had this happen in regard to legal matters I’m working on. I think it’s because sometimes when you’re not thinking about something intently is when inspiration strikes. One thing I have learned is when you have inspiration, don’t lose it.

Whether I am at my desk or asleep, if something good pops into my mind, I write it down. I usually use the Note app on my phone, but paper and pen still work. I have learned that if I don’t, there is a good chance my moment of brilliance will be lost; I may remember it later, but I may not.

The key is to come up with what works for you when you have that great idea, even when it’s at an inconvenient moment. If you fail to record your thoughts when the inspiration hits, it’s on you and is your loss. Come up with what works best for you so you don’t risk losing whatever fantastic thing has popped into your brain.

One way to think about it is what if you were a musician and you didn’t want to get up in the middle of the night to record that melody that came into your head, losing a possible big hit. Or if you were an author and you lose a great plot twist for the book you’re writing. We all have something equivalent in what we do for a living, or in our personal lives. Figure out what works so you remember and can capitalize on your great ideas.